How to Ask for a Letter of Recommendation

Your scholarship application is filled out, and you’ve written a killer personal statement. You are confident that your application makes you look like an attractive candidate.

Now it’s time to work on letters of recommendation. Maybe you’re not sure who to ask, or how to ask. Or maybe you’re a bit shy.  You figure that you have until the deadline to ask your recommender. It’s only a quick letter, how hard can it be? 

Needless to say, this is a good plan of action. Most people are happy to write letters of recommendation, but they won’t be happy to do it at the last minute. Your recommenders are very busy and won’t appreciate the short notice.

There is a correct time, place, and way to ask for a letter of recommendation. Keep reading! We’re going to answer all of those questions in this post.  

What You Should Know Before Asking

Your homework starts well before you ask for a letter of recommendation. It starts with understanding what a letter of recommendation even is. After all, if you don’t understand the purpose of the letter, it’s going to be hard to choose a good recommender.

While your application may express that you graduated cum laude, this doesn’t say much about you as a person. 

This is where letters of recommendation come in handy. They showcase a more personal side of you that the rest of your application may not show. They tell a story about your character while highlighting the traits that make you unique.

This is the purpose of a recommendation letter. Now that you know the purpose, you can decide who to ask to be your recommender. You will want to ask somebody who knows you well as a person and can vouch for your successes.

The most appropriate people to ask are teachers or guidance counselors. If you ask a teacher, choose a teacher who knows you well and who likes you. 

A good rule of thumb is that if you like and respect the teacher, they probably feel the same about you. In fact, the more you like the teacher the more they probably like you as well (this rule of thumb also works for dislike too, in case you were wondering). The teachers you like are the ones you are going to want to approach. 

While most applications only ask for one letter of recommendation, some schools may ask for two. For that reason, it’s a good idea to ask two different teachers for a letter. If you can only think of one, you can also ask a guidance counselor for a letter instead.  

How Far in Advance Should You Ask?

Asking for a letter of recommendation at the last minute is not the way to go. In fact, it’s the worst way to go and is really the only mistake you can make when asking for a letter of recommendation.  

Asking at the last minute puts time pressure on the recommender, and shows them you aren’t organized and serious about your application. Needless to say, this is not the way to get a good letter of recommendation.

Letters of recommendation take time and consideration to write. Recommenders may have other commitments, and might even have other students to write letters for. If they are nice enough and agree to write at the last minute, it may not even turn out to be a great letter as they will have to rush through it. A good letter takes thought, planning, and time. 

That’s why we recommend asking your recommender at least one month before application deadlines. If you can ask earlier than a month, then go ahead and ask even earlier. The more time you give your recommender, the better off you will be. 

Yet another reason to ask early is that teachers are less likely to have committed to writing letters for other students. This improves the chances that they will say yes to you. Also, later in the year, teachers are usually busy with exams and grading papers. No one wants more work when they are already busy grading exams and papers.   

The bottom line is that if we can give you one piece of advice about asking for a letter of recommendation it’s this: the earlier you ask the better, don’t ask at the last minute. 

Now that you know who to ask, and when to ask, we’re going to talk about the hardest part for many students: how to ask.  

How to Ask a Teacher for a Letter of Recommendation

We’re gonna focus on teachers here since they are the most commonly asked person. This makes sense since teachers also have the best opportunity to get to know you – both academically and personally. This is why teachers are a great option if you have one that you have a close relationship with.

If you aren’t sure you have a good relationship with a teacher or prefer to ask a guidance counselor for a letter of recommendation, scroll down as we’ll address this after we talk about teachers. 

How to Make Your Request – Email or Face to Face?

Asking a teacher for a recommendation over email might work, but in our opinion, face-to-face, when possible, is the better way to go. If you must ask by email, we’ll explain how later.

Asking for a recommendation letter face-to-face adds a personal touch that has several advantages email doesn’t. 

Unlike over email, if you talk with your teacher face to face you can be sure you will have your teacher’s full attention, and that they won’t be distracted by other tasks.

Asking face to face also takes less time. Teachers might have follow up questions about the program, deadlines, or the letter, that you may be able to answer on the spot. This allows them to write a better letter.

Finally, humanity and confidence go a long way. Eye contact, a smile, and a polite, tone of voice simply makes it more likely that your teacher will say yes, even if they are already extremely busy. 

Find a time that is comfortable for your teacher to talk. Approach them before or after class, or during their free period if they have one.

How Should You Actually Ask?

Even if it’s a teacher you feel very comfortable with, asking for a recommendation can still be scary. Keep in mind that your teacher is likely familiar with the recommendation process. They’ve probably written several letters in the past, and they probably understand that you might not feel comfortable asking. 

Once you approach them, there really isn’t much to it. All you need to do is explain that you need a letter of recommendation for university. 

Tell them that you enjoy their class (only if you really do), and then simply ask them if they would be willing to write you a letter for whatever college you are applying to. If you want, you can tell them that you think they are a good person to ask, because they are familiar with your character and your hard work. If you’ve had the teacher a few years, they are probably an especially good person to ask. 

We’d guess that 95% of the time, teachers say yes. At the end of the day, a good teacher is on their student’s side and wants to see them succeed. Even if they don’t know you that well, they might have a more generic letter that they can write for you. The only time that they might say no, is if they have been asked at the last minute and don’t have enough time to write. 

If your teacher for some reason does say no, it’s not the end of the world. In fact, it’s probably best not to get a letter from a teacher who doesn’t want to write it in the first place. You can always ask another teacher. Like we said, most teachers are usually happy to write letters for their students, as long as it isn’t at the last minute.

Once you get the “okay” from your teacher, it’s time to plan your next step. You’ll want to set up a meeting with your teacher to discuss the logistics of the letter and share information about yourself.

Information to Give Your Teacher

Even if you feel like your teacher knows you well, you should still plan to sit down with them and give them more information about yourself. Remember, they have many students every year. They may not remember that you played volleyball last year or wrote for your school’s newspaper.

First, you’ll want to give your recommender logistical information about the application. Where are you applying? Do you know what you want to major in? When is the deadline? How should they submit your letter of recommendation? It’s common to submit the letter through the Common Application, Naviance, or through the college’s website.

Other than logistics, you’ll want to come prepared with information about yourself. Share some personal aspects about yourself that you want your recommender to include in the letter. These may include traits, values, or accomplishments.

You should share information that will ultimately boost your candidacy. Try to provide as many details and personal examples as possible. 

You might want to type out a list of your attributes and accomplishments on a paper. You can bring this to the meeting and even leave it with your recommender. While you may feel awkward doing this, your teacher will likely appreciate this, as it will save them time and energy. It will also help them be more organized.

How to Ask For a Letter of Recommendation Via Email

If you are unable to or uncomfortable with asking your recommender for a letter in person, you can ask them via email. This should be your last resort. 

Keep your email short and to the point. Teachers are busy and might ignore, or forget your email if it is too long.

If it is a teacher you had in the past, remind them who you are by telling them what class you took with them and what year.

Here is an example of an email you can send: 

“Dear Mr. Marks, I was your student in Advanced Algebra during the 2019-2020 school year. I learned a lot in your class and it has inspired me to pursue a major in mathematics. I am applying to Northwestern University and would be happy if you could write me a strong letter of recommendation. I would greatly appreciate it. I am happy to set up a time to meet and discuss my accomplishments and involvement in school. Thank you X.”

How to Ask a Letter of Recommendation From Your School Counselor

If you don’t have a teacher you can ask for a letter of recommendation, ask your school counselor. If you choose to go this route, you’ll need a different plan of action. Your relationship with your counselor is probably a lot different than your relationship with teachers.

The easy part about asking for a letter from a school counselor is that you don’t need to think about who to ask, as you probably only have one counselor. The other easy part is that your counselor expects you to ask for a letter of recommendation from them.

If you ask for a letter from your school counselor, expect the process to be more collaborative. Counselors see dozens of students every year and don’t have time to get to know each student on a personal level. For this reason, make sure you provide your counselor with enough information so that they can write a unique letter for you.

Like asking a teacher for a recommendation, plan a face-to-face meeting with your counselor. It will be helpful to bring along that same list of accomplishments and personal attributes. Share any information with your counselor that you think might help your candidacy and set you apart from other students. For example, if you took on a leadership position in your school’s volunteer club, share that with them. Your counselor might not know you well, so put in more effort to ensure that your letter is personal.

You will likely already have some meetings scheduled with your counselor to talk about college. This is a good opportunity to ask for a letter of recommendation. Again, you can do this at the end of your junior year or at the beginning of your senior year. If you don’t have a meeting scheduled, go ahead, take initiative, and schedule one!

Again, don’t wait for the last minute to ask for a recommendation. Counselors have a ton of work, especially as deadlines get closer. Make a good impression by asking your counselor to meet early and come prepared to the meeting.

Remember to share the logistical information about your application with your counselor. Let them know where you are applying and of course, when deadlines are. If you are applying for an early decision, share this information with them as well.

Next Steps After Asking for a Letter of Recommendation

Congratulations! You’ve made it past the hardest part, asking your recommender for a letter and meeting with them. But, your work isn’t over yet.

The next thing you need to do is make sure that your letter gets submitted! Two weeks before the deadline, follow up with your recommender with an email if they still haven’t submitted. Be sure to express your gratitude and remind them of the deadline in a polite manner. Also mention that you are happy to provide them with more information, should they need it.

If you see that they haven’t submitted it one week before the deadline, shoot them another email. While you may feel like this is a bit nagging, it’s your responsibility to make sure they submit it.

Your recommender might share the letter with you before they submit it. They do this to get your feedback and make sure that all the information in the letter is correct. You’re lucky if your recommender shares the letter with you. Jump on the opportunity to make sure that your letter expresses everything you want.

Most recommendation letters are submitted online. In some rare cases, recommenders prefer to mail in the letter. If this is the case for you, you’ll have to provide your recommender with a pre-stamped envelope.

After your recommender has submitted your letter, it’s time to thank them for taking the time to write a letter. This is a small action that can go a long way.

Finally, don’t forget to share with the recommender if you get accepted to the college or win that scholarship!

Final Thoughts

As with every other part of your application, letters of recommendation are very important. The more work you put into them, the better they will be.

Although you’re not the one writing the letter, that doesn’t mean it’s time to kick your feet up and do nothing. It’s your job to find a recommender who knows you well and who can vouch for you in the letter.

Request your letter of recommendation in person and set up a time with your teacher or counselor to go over it. Share with them important logistical information such as deadlines. Also, highlight your top traits so that they can write a great letter that is unique to you.  Finally, and most importantly, give them enough time before the deadline to write you a thoughtful letter. And of course, don’t forget to thank them after they’ve submitted your letter!